Bonobo Network presents: Don’t Stop Believin’! 80s Prom Night

🗓️ Date: Saturday, February 28th 2026 7pm - 2am

📍 Location: Details revealed upon ticket purchase

Workin’ hard to get my fill, everybody wants a thrill…

We feel you, Steve – and that’s why thrills will abound at Don’t Stop Believin’: An 80s Prom Night.

Work up a sweat getting footloose on the dance floor with your fellow Material Girls, let’s get physical in the dungeon, and before you leave, be sure to purify yourself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka. ☔️

The night will feature performances by Fou Fou Ha!, an opening ritual by lucid dawn, William’s Sex Party Survival Guide playshop, music by some of our favorite Bonobo DJs, and a photo booth to capture your perfect prom night memories.

So get your big hair ready, grab your finest pair of Chucks (the shoes, perverts), and don your least realistic corsages. 80s prom is here!

This is a member’s only event. If you are interested in attending and learning more then join Bonobo Network here: https://www.bonobonetwork.com/apply

Bonobo Network Presents Kiss and Tell: A Sexy Second Bass Party

🗓 Date: Friday, February 13, 2026 7pm-2am

📍 Location: address will be released to ticket holders

GET TICKETS HERE: 

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/bonobo-network-presents-kiss-and-tell-a-sexy-second-bass-party-tickets-1980676541855

Agenda

7:00 PM - 9:15 PM Doors open
NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.

7:30 PM - 8:30 PM Playshop: Group Groove! Dancing with 2... or 3... or More

9:15 PM Opening Circle
[NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.]

1:45 AM - Closing Circle
Closing Circle is a time for us to share our experience, ecstatic or hard, to be seen, known, and normalize that these events are a full spectrum experience for everyone.

About this event

They say that dance is the vertical expression of horizontal desires. Guess we'll find out just how true that is.

At Kiss and Tell, your expressions of desire may need to stay clothed – barely – but they don't have to stay vertical. Take a break from dancing on our dance floor to sensuously snuggle with lovers old and new.

The nightwill feature an incredible lineup of DJs and tea house run by our friends at Tea Tribe. Plus, a fun microfusion dance playshop by A'lan and Adrienne is certain to warm you up for the night’s activities.

Unlike our full play parties, this event is open to people who are not Bonobo Network members. With lower stakes and a more relaxed vibe, it's a perfect way to introduce Bonobo-curious friends, or those feeling a little nervous about play parties, to our community.

Just remember that the party has "second base" limits on connection, which means you’ll need to keep your panties on. We'll get you all worked up with a bevy of sensual explorations but you'll have to take the party home to go any further.

To make sure everyone feels safe enough to play at their edges, we don't allow any physical touch without clear consent. If you can't play by the rules, you may be asked to leave the party -- and that's no fun!

This is an alcohol-free event. We encourage you to limit intoxication so you can stay tuned in to the needs, boundaries, and desires of your fellow guests.

Make sure you understand our consent framework by watching this video: https://youtu.be/PffpK5g2q9k

Make sure you're up on Bonobo party etiquette by watching this video: https://youtu.be/eCtnU0SCdSA?si=xAHd7u-oKLG0HSdm

Learn more about our consent framework at https://bonobonetwork.com/consent

If you are not yet a Bonobo Network member but you’re interested in joining you can learn more about us at https://bonobonetwork.com and apply for membership at https://bonobonetwork.com/apply. By joining you'll get access to all of our play parties and members only community events.

Please be sure to read ALL details below.

Your Eventbrite FINAL DETAILS email will contain ALL relevant details for attending this event TO ARRIVE THE DAY BEFORE THE EVENT. Check your email - including your spam folder - for a message from noreply@eventbrite.com. Please read this email in full and instruct any guests for whom you may have purchased tickets to do the same!

»»» Playshop

Group Groove! Dancing with 2 ... or 3 ... or More 💃✨🕺🏻Loves!
Come dive into the deliciously saucy world of shared dances as you mix and mingle with the beautiful humans of Bonobos and friends. This class is your chance to step out of the noise of the world, drop into your body, and co-create bite-sized adventures in pleasure and group play. Along the way, we’ll practice partner dance skills, consent communication, and attunement techniques to help us connect more deeply and play more sweetly.

Come solo or partnered, brand new or a seasoned dancer—or if this is your first flirtation with second base parties. We’ve got you. The container will be held with care, and we’ll move at the speed of trust.

Come play! 💖 You belong here.

A’lan and Adrienne are embodiment and connection guides who create experiences rooted in presence, sensation, and movement. A’lan brings nearly two decades of partner dance and rope instruction, weaving intimacy and attunement into every offering. Adrienne draws on over 17 years of yoga practice, along with fusion dance and climbing, to invite flow, somatic awareness, and playful embodiment. Together, they blend the sacred and the sensual, creating spaces where people can drop into aliveness, trust, and the pleasure of being fully in their bodies.

»»» Entertainment

Spoken Bird
Spoken Bird draws influence from glitch, breaks, and hip hop, blending them into one cohesive sound that plunges the listener into the depths of their own imagination. Gorgeous instrumentation laid over glitchy drum breaks and supremely creative synth patterns fuse with psychedelic soundscapes as Spoken Bird paints masterpieces on silence with sound. Are you ready? Notable performances include Symbiosis Gathering, Lucidity Festival, Serenity Gathering, Enchanted Forest, Pirate Party and Burning Man.

Mayvn
Oakland artist Mayvn weaves a dancy desert dj set laced with live clarinet and sax, guiding you on a global bass and house trip. Classically trained in New York, MAYVN toured extensively the past 15 years with Folk and Electronic artists. She has graced the stages of Red Rocks, Coachella, Lightning in a Bottle, Shambala, Texas Eclipse, Joshua Tree, Envision Festival and more.

Tea House by Tea Tribe
Tea Tribe creates tea oases for guests to find sanctuary at events. Tea drinkers enjoy a calming environment in which to enjoy gourmet tea in a beautiful setting. Attendees are invited to shelter in our comfortable, and gorgeously decorated tents and lounges while our crew of tea ceremonialists serve fine teas from around the world in numerous traditional styles. These experiences cultivate heart-based connection, community, mindfulness, inner peace, appreciation of beauty, intercultural understanding, and reverence for nature.

»»» Connect on Plura (FKA Bloom)

Want to see who's going, match, chat, and meet the community? https://heyplura.com/events/kissandtell-021326

»»» Foreplay - Pre-party meetup

Foreplay is a fantastic way to get to know each other with our clothes on and in a low-pressure environment. You're welcome to bring friends and lovers who've never been to a Bonobo event but who may be interested! https://heyplura.com/events/kissandtellforeplay-021026

»»» Venue Accessibility

Our venue consists of a wheelchair accessible single level, with wheelchair accessible bathrooms. Please let us know about other accessibility needs and we'll do our best to offer accommodations.

»»» Volunteering

Volunteering is a great way to meet other Bonobos, and volunteer tickets have discounts baked into them as a thank you for your contribution. Available roles include:

Pre-Party

• Setup (Saturday 4pm - 6pm Pre-party)

During Party

• Food Support (60 minutes at the beginning of the party)

• Greeting (90 minute shifts before and during party)

• Covid Testing Support ( 90 minute shifts before and during party)

• Angel Crew (60 minute shifts during party)

• Cleaning (60 minute shifts during party)

Post-Party

• Strike (Saturday 11am - 1pm Post-Party)

»»» Inviting your Friends

Want to invite a friend to this or future parties? Great! Bonobo Network membership is NOT required to attend Kiss And Tell. If they'd like to become a Bonobo member, you can invite them to learn more about us and apply at https://bonobonetwork.com/apply.

• Your friends should FULLY understand Bonobo Network's culture, especially around consent.

• They should be broadly familiar with their boundaries and be able to set boundaries with others.

• They should be able to resolve conflicts gracefully, generously, and empathetically.

• They're someone you trust to be accountable to you and to this community.

• Ideally, you trust them implicitly, and you would either play with them yourself or recommend that your friends play with them at the party.

• You would feel comfortable staking your reputation on their being a good fit for our community. (NOTE: This is different from feeling confident that they would enjoy themselves or get something out of the experience.)

»»» Registration + Tickets

Tickets for our standard members will be on a sliding scale starting at $75.

Tickets will be on a sliding scale starting at $65 for PrimeMates, our premium members. [PRIMEMATE MEMBERS: You have a special code that you received when you became a member. Use that for your discount.]

IMPORTANT!

If you're purchasing more than one ticket, please make sure each individual attending is named!

Once you purchase your ticket, your Eventbrite confirmation email will contain all relevant details for attending this event. Check your email - including your spam folder - for a message from noreply@eventbrite.com. Please read this email in full and instruct any guests for whom you may have purchased tickets to do the same!

»»» Our Ticketing Pricing Policy

***NOTAFLOF Tickets - Action Required (see below)

Supporting Our Community: No One Turned Away for Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) Changes

As we continue to grow and create memorable experiences together, we want to share some important updates regarding the way we manage tickets for our events. Thank you for your feedback about access to tickets and creating ease around ticket transfers. We hope these changes provide a lot better user experience. We are also providing clearer guidelines about use of NOTOFLOF codes and a new request system for those who use those codes. NOTAFLOF Codes are by Request Only.

Please use this form before the event to request a NOTAFLOF discount code. You can then apply this code on the day of the ticket drop.

Request a NOTAFLOF discount code here

25% Off: For those with moderate financial needs. Examples might include:

• Those with some medical expenses not covered by insurance.

• Individuals who have periodic financial difficulties but can generally manage their expenses.

50% Off: For those with significant financial constraints. Examples might include:

• Those with limited income or support.

• Individuals with large, ongoing medical expenses or disabilities.

»»» Covid Policy

We no longer require proof of vaccination. You must take a covid test before the event.

Your COVID testing options are:

• Present a timestamped photo of a covid rapid antigen test taken the day of the event at the door.

• Present the results of a PCR test administered within 48 hours of the party.

• Bring your own COVID test to take on site. If you use this option, please wear a mask into the venue. There will be a limited supply of rapid tests available for purchase - PLEASE BRING YOUR OWN.

If you need to take a COVID test onsite, you must wear a mask.

»»» Incident Reporting

If your boundaries are crossed at the party, if a Bonobo member acts in ways that are not in accordance with our culture and values, or even if someone just kinda creeps you out, please report the incident to an angel or party host. We also encourage you to file an incident report online at http://bit.ly/bonoboincidentreport.

Incident reports aren't just for consent violations at Bonobo events. If people are behaving in the ways described above outside of parties, it can be helpful for organizers to know.

»»» Bonobo Network Principles

What began as a series of small parties in Summer 2010 has grown into a community that has served 3,000 people around the Bay Area and the world. Our community is united by the following principles, which inform how we orient towards the spaces we share and how we treat one another:

High Possibility, Low Expectation: Our communities are best when they're treated as high possibility, low expectation spaces. That means two things: first, that all kinds of awesome sexy interactions are possible, but that no one should be expected to interact with you in any particular way. No one owes you anything. Second, we often attend these events with an expectation of the type or quality of experience we should have. While anything is possible, you'll probably have a much better experience if you lose those expectations of yourself and open yourself up to the abundance of connection of all kinds available to you at the party. Low expectation DOES NOT mean "low desire" – we believe it's helpful to have a well-explored and articulated sense of what you want and to hold those desires lightly.

Trust and Integrity: Parties like ours are built on trust – that's what allows us to be as open and welcoming and vulnerable as we can be inside those spaces. But this requires that we all show up in full integrity, pledging to be our most trustworthy. Three important implications of this : keep the identities of folks at our events confidential, proactively disclose relevant safer sex risks, and take exquisite care of the venues, spaces, and neighborhood ecosystems that host us.

Consent: We agree that we will only physically engage with one another, including nonsexual touch, where there is CLEAR CONSENT. We define consent as an ongoing collaboration between two or more people in constant verbal, physical, and emotional dialogue about what each other needs to safely, willingly, and pleasurably interact with one another. Gold standard consent in Bonobo Network is affirmative, informed, unpressured, specific, competently given, and ongoing. Respecting and valuing consent isn't just about preventing violations that shred trust -- it's also about making sure that everyone has as much space as they need to fully occupy their yes. Please read our Consent and Accountability Policy for more details on how we approach consent and accountability.

High Challenge, High Support: Play parties can be challenging and emotionally complex, even for seasoned veterans. We’re committed to making the play parties we throw high challenge, high support environments. We come together to celebrate and play at our edges. To fully support that endeavor, we provide a dedicated nonsexual space at each party for folks who need to get away from the intensity of the gathering. It means recruiting a team of angels who are available to provide counseling and social support throughout the party. And it means encouraging everyone who attends to commit to being an angel for everyone around them.

Here's a guide to have a pre-party conversation with your sweetie(s) to make your party go smoothly for you.

Everyone Contributes: Parties like this are never the work of a single organizer -- it takes the participation and contribution of a host of people. Everyone who attends is expected to co-create the party: money, time, energy, enthusiasm, work, intention, example, concern and/or awareness.

Inclusion: We are dedicated to fostering inclusion in our community. No matter your race, ethnicity, gender identity, or class background, we want everyone who participates in this community to understand that they belong here, and that they have as much of a stake in what happens here as anyone else does. While we recognize that everyone is on a learning curve when it comes to learning how to foster such an atmosphere, we also commit to a stance of learning -- and supporting one another's learning -- of how to be excellent to one another.

This is a dynamic list, ever growing, changing, and deepening as this grand experiment in connection continues. Thanks to you all for playing mad scientist with us.

Bonobo Network presents: You’re A Hot One, Mx. Grinch

🗓️ Date: Saturday, December 13th 2025 7pm - 3am

📍 Location: Details revealed upon ticket purchase

SAVE THE DATE! TICKET LAUNCH THURSDAY November 20th at 7pm

Every Horny down in Hornyville liked playing a lot.
Mx. Grinch, who lived just north of Hornyville, Did NOT.
Mx. Grinch hated holidays, the whole winter season.
Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.

Mx. Grinch doesn’t share in the holiday spirit one bit –
no solstice, no Christmas, no Hanukah, no Kwanzaa, no New Year’s Eve,
and DEFINITELY no orgies celebrating any of these!

Mx. Grinch stole all of Hornyville’s lube before the Hornyville Holiday Orgy, where all the Hornies in Hornyville get together to create some holiday magic. Maybe some especially sexy Hornies can convince them to return the lube and keep the holiday spirit alive…

This is a member’s only event. If you are interested in attending and learning more then join Bonobo Network here: https://www.bonobonetwork.com/apply

Bonobo Network presents: Spanksgiving

🗓️ Date: Friday, November 28th 2025 7pm - 3am

📍 Location: Details revealed upon ticket purchase

SAVE THE DATE! TICKET LAUNCH THURSDAY November 6th at 7pm

Let us give spanks!

Give thanks… and give thwacks!

It’s that special time of year when we gather ‘round the spanking bench to celebrate our favorite fall tradition: gratitude and glutes. Forget dry turkey... we’re serving up juicy cheeks, warm hands, and the sweet sound of appreciation.

Bring your attitude of gratitude (and your favorite paddle) for a night of playful punishment, impact delights, and plenty of aftercare stuffing. Whether you like to dish it out or take your serving like a champ, there’s a seat for you at this table.

Let’s get basted, Bonobos. 🧡

This is a member’s only event. If you are interested in attending and learning more then join Bonobo Network here: https://www.bonobonetwork.com/apply

Bonobo Network Presents Kiss and Tell: A Sexy Second Bass Party

🗓️ Date: Saturday, November 22nd, 2025 2025 7pm-3am

📍 Location: address will be released to ticket holders

GET TICKETS HERE: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/bonobo-network-presents-kiss-and-tell-a-sexy-second-bass-party-tickets-1847794145029?aff=oddtdtcreator

Tickets on sale October 30th at 7pm

Agenda

7:00 PM - 9:15 PM Doors open

NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.

7:30 PM - 8:30 AM

Playshop: Authentic Relating for Heart Connection with Adam Cohen

9:15 PM - 10:00 PM Opening Circle

[NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.]

2:00 AM - 2:30 AM Closing Circle

Closing Circle is a time for us to share our experience, ecstatic or hard, to be seen, known, and normalize that these events are a full spectrum experience for everyone.

About this event

They say that dance is the vertical expression of horizontal desires. Guess we'll find out just how true that is.

At Kiss and Tell, your expressions of desire may need to stay clothed – barely – but they don't have to stay vertical. Take a break from dancing on our 1500 sq. foot dance floor to sensuously snuggle with lovers old and new.

The night’s music will feature an incredible lineup of DJs. Plus a fun playshop to open the night is certain to warm you up for the night’s activities.

Unlike our full play parties, this event is open to non-Bonobo members. With lower stakes and a more relaxed vibe, it's a perfect way to introduce Bonobo-curious friends, or those feeling a little nervous about play parties, to our community.

Just remember that the party has "second base" limits on connection, which means you’ll need to keep your panties on. We'll get you all worked up with a bevy of sensual explorations but you'll have to take the party home to go any further.

To make sure everyone feels safe enough to play at their edges, we don't allow any physical touch without clear consent. If you can't play by the rules, you may be asked to leave the party -- and that's no fun!

This is an alcohol-free event. We encourage you to limit intoxication so you can stay tuned in to the needs, boundaries, and desires of your fellow guests.

Make sure you're up on Bonobo party etiquette by watching this video: https://youtu.be/eCtnU0SCdSA?si=xAHd7u-oKLG0HSdm

Learn more about our consent framework at https://bonobonetwork.com/consent

If you are not yet a Bonobo Network member but you’re interested in joining you can learn more about us at https://bonobonetwork.com and apply for membership at https://bonobonetwork.com/apply. By joining you'll get access to all of our play parties and members only community events.

Please be sure to read ALL details below.

Your Eventbrite FINAL DETAILS email will contain ALL relevant details for attending this event TO ARRIVE THE DAY BEFORE THE EVENT. Check your email - including your spam folder - for a message from noreply@eventbrite.com. Please read this email in full and instruct any guests for whom you may have purchased tickets to do the same!

»»» Playshop

Authentic Relating for Heart Connection with Adam Cohen

In this immersive playshop, we'll explore the intoxicating, grounding, and enlivening power of deep human connection. Through games and exercises you'll have the chance to feel connected to your fellow playmates before the clothes come off.

Bio:

Dr. Adam Cohen is clinical psychologist in private practice and leading groups on mindfulness, resilience, communication and finding meaning. While his passion for vulnerability and healing led him to become a therapist, his love of play and group connection eventually led him to authentic relating games. Seeing the value of fun games that also offer deeply nourishing emotional connection and belonging, he enjoys leading authentic relating games as a passion project.

»»» Entertainment DJs

J-Plus

J-plus is a former competitive b-boy turned DJ. His love for dance and movement has been a major part of his life, and he loves to share this passion with everyone on the dance floor. His music sets are typically 1990s - 2010s hip-hop/R&B and house music.

Grease Withaspoon

Grease Withaspoon is a whimsical, multi-genre DJ from Los Angeles. Each one of his sets has a life and vibration of its own... His selections combine elements of Hip Hop, Bass Music, House, Latino and bits of nostalgia that drip over eclectic beats and bass heavy rhythms.. Grease mixes it all seamlessly with live beat making, loops, & samples, creating a new soundscape each time he plays.

As a reminder, we take our culture really seriously in Bonobo Network, and if you’re not a member it’s very important that you understand our expectations before you attend the party! Check out our orientation resources on the ticketing page and in your confirmation email before you attend.

Hear more of his music at https://Soundcloud.com/grease_withaspoon

»»» Connect on Plura (FKA Bloom)

Want to see who's going, match, chat, and meet the community? https://plra.io/m/bonobo-kissandtell-112225

»»» Foreplay - Pre-party meetup

Foreplay is a fantastic way to get to know each other with our clothes on and in a low-pressure environment. You're welcome to bring friends and lovers who've never been to a Bonobo event but who may be interested! https://plra.io/m/kissandtell-forepla-112225

»»» Venue Accessibility

Although our party venue consists of multiple levels connected by stairs, all levels are wheelchair accessible via a lift. There is a wheelchair accessible bathroom on the first floor. We are committed to making accommodations wherever possible. If you have specific accessibility needs or require further assistance, please do not hesitate to contact us in advance, and we will do our utmost to assist you.

»»» Volunteering

Volunteering is a great way to meet other Bonobos, and volunteer tickets have discounts baked into them as a thank you for your contribution. Available roles include:

Pre-Party

1. Setup (Saturday 5pm - 7pm Pre-party)

During Party

1. Food Support (60 minutes at the beginning of the party)

2. Greeting (90 minute shifts before and during party)

3. Covid Testing Support ( 90 minute shifts before and during party)

4. Angel Crew (60 minute shifts during party)

5. Cleaning (60 minute shifts during party)

Post-Party

1. Strike (Sunday 11am - 1pm Post-Party)

2. 
   
   

»»» Inviting your Friends

Want to invite a friend to this or future parties? Great! Bonobo Network membership is NOT required to attend Kiss And Tell. If they'd like to become a Bonobo member, you can invite them to learn more about us and apply at https://bonobonetwork.com/apply.

1. Your friends should FULLY understand Bonobo Network's culture, especially around consent.

2. They should be broadly familiar with their boundaries and be able to set boundaries with others.

3. They should be able to resolve conflicts gracefully, generously, and empathetically.

4. They're someone you trust to be accountable to you and to this community.

5. Ideally, you trust them implicitly, and you would either play with them yourself or recommend that your friends play with them at the party.

6. You would feel comfortable staking your reputation on their being a good fit for our community. (NOTE: This is different from feeling confident that they would enjoy themselves or get something out of the experience.)

»»» Registration + Tickets

Tickets for our standard members will be on a sliding scale starting at $75.

Tickets will be on a sliding scale starting at $65 for PrimeMates, our premium members. [PRIMEMATE MEMBERS: You have a special code that you received when you became a member. Use that for your discount.]

IMPORTANT!

If you're purchasing more than one ticket, please make sure each individual attending is named!

Once you purchase your ticket, your Eventbrite confirmation email will contain all relevant details for attending this event. Check your email - including your spam folder - for a message from noreply@eventbrite.com. Please read this email in full and instruct any guests for whom you may have purchased tickets to do the same!

»»» Our Ticketing Pricing Policy

***NOTAFLOF Tickets - Action Required (see below)

As we continue to grow and create memorable experiences together, we want to share some important updates regarding the way we manage tickets for our events. Thank you for your feedback about access to tickets and creating ease around ticket transfers. We hope these changes provide a lot better user experience. We are also providing clearer guidelines about use of NOTOFLOF codes and a new request system for those who use those codes.

Supporting Our Community: No One Turned Away for Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) Changes

NOTAFLOF Codes by Request Only

We will be changing the NOTAFLOF codes for each party. Please use this Form before the event to request a NOTAFLOF discount code. You can then apply this code on the day of the ticket drop.

Request a NOTAFLOF discount code here

25% Off: For those with moderate financial needs. Examples might include:

1. Those with some medical expenses not covered by insurance.

2. Individuals who have periodic financial difficulties but can generally manage their expenses.

50% Off: For those with significant financial constraints. Examples might include:

1. Those with limited income or support.

2. Individuals with large, ongoing medical expenses or disabilities.

»»» Covid Policy

We no longer require proof of vaccination. You must take a covid test before the event.

Your COVID testing options are:

1. Present a timestamped photo of a covid rapid antigen test taken the day of the event at the door.

2. Present the results of a PCR test administered within 48 hours of the party.

3. Bring your own COVID test to take on site. If you use this option, please wear a mask into the venue. There will be a limited supply of rapid tests available for purchase - PLEASE BRING YOUR OWN.

If you need to take a COVID test onsite, you must wear a mask.

»»» Incident Reporting

If your boundaries are crossed at the party, if a Bonobo member acts in ways that are not in accordance with our culture and values, or even if someone just kinda creeps you out, please report the incident to an angel or party host. We also encourage you to file an incident report online at http://bit.ly/bonoboincidentreport.

Incident reports aren't just for consent violations at Bonobo events. If people are behaving in the ways described above outside of parties, it can be helpful for organizers to know.

»»» Bonobo Network Principles

What began as a series of small parties in Summer 2010 has grown into a community that has served 3,000 people around the Bay Area and the world. Our community is united by the following principles, which inform how we orient towards the spaces we share and how we treat one another:

High Possibility, Low Expectation: Our communities are best when they're treated as high possibility, low expectation spaces. That means two things: first, that all kinds of awesome sexy interactions are possible, but that no one should be expected to interact with you in any particular way. No one owes you anything. Second, we often attend these events with an expectation of the type or quality of experience we should have. While anything is possible, you'll probably have a much better experience if you lose those expectations of yourself and open yourself up to the abundance of connection of all kinds available to you at the party. Low expectation DOES NOT mean "low desire" – we believe it's helpful to have a well-explored and articulated sense of what you want and to hold those desires lightly.

Trust and Integrity: Parties like ours are built on trust – that's what allows us to be as open and welcoming and vulnerable as we can be inside those spaces. But this requires that we all show up in full integrity, pledging to be our most trustworthy. Three important implications of this : keep the identities of folks at our events confidential, proactively disclose relevant safer sex risks, and take exquisite care of the venues, spaces, and neighborhood ecosystems that host us.

Consent: We agree that we will only physically engage with one another, including nonsexual touch, where there is CLEAR CONSENT. We define consent as an ongoing collaboration between two or more people in constant verbal, physical, and emotional dialogue about what each other needs to safely, willingly, and pleasurably interact with one another. Gold standard consent in Bonobo Network is affirmative, informed, unpressured, specific, competently given, and ongoing. Respecting and valuing consent isn't just about preventing violations that shred trust -- it's also about making sure that everyone has as much space as they need to fully occupy their yes. Please read our Consent and Accountability Policy (https://bit.ly/bonoboconsentpolicy) for more details on how we approach consent and accountability.

High Challenge, High Support: Play parties can be challenging and emotionally complex, even for seasoned veterans. We’re committed to making the play parties we throw high challenge, high support environments. We come together to celebrate and play at our edges. To fully support that endeavor, we provide a dedicated nonsexual space at each party for folks who need to get away from the intensity of the gathering. It means recruiting a team of angels who are available to provide counseling and social support throughout the party. And it means encouraging everyone who attends to commit to being an angel for everyone around them.

H ere's a guide to have a pre-party conversation with your sweetie(s) to make your party go smoothly for both of you: https://bit.ly/beingpartyready

Everyone Contributes: Parties like this are never the work of a single organizer -- it takes the participation and contribution of a host of people. Everyone who attends is expected to co-create the party: money, time, energy, enthusiasm, work, intention, example, concern and/or awareness.

Inclusion: We are dedicated to fostering inclusion in our community. No matter your race, ethnicity, gender identity, or class background, we want everyone who participates in this community to understand that they belong here, and that they have as much of a stake in what happens here as anyone else does. While we recognize that everyone is on a learning curve when it comes to learning how to foster such an atmosphere, we also commit to a stance of learning -- and supporting one another's learning -- of how to be excellent to one another.

This is a dynamic list, ever growing, changing, and deepening as this grand experiment in connection continues. Thanks to you all for playing mad scientist with us.

Bonobo Network at Dark Odyssey: Surrender! 2025

Friday October 24 - Monday October 27
San Jose, CA

🌟 Calling all Bonobos! Who's joining us at Dark Odyssey? 🌟 Let's make this a weekend to remember! 🖤🔥

Bonobo Network will be out in force at Dark Odyssey: Surrender, a conference-style hotel takeover where attendees learn all about kink and sexuality – and then practice on each other in their massive dungeon and play spaces. 😈

• We are thrilled to announce that  we’ll be hosting the hospitality suite during lunch on Saturday, as we have for the last couple years.

• Bonobo founder William Winters will teach a couple of classes. 

• Community Manager JessJess will lead Kinky Karaoke again Saturday night. 

• AND there will even be a Bonobo party within the event on Sunday night!

We’ll say more about this soon, but for now you can learn more or get your tickets to Dark Odyssey: Surrender at https://darkodyssey.com/surrender.

Connect with Attendees: Plura

You can use this space to talk about specific classes you main be interested in and see if others want to joining you. Looking for a roommate to share costs and company, post it here. Who's up for grabbing a bite together? Remember, communication is key to making this event special for everyone. Share your thoughts, interests, and availability in the comments. 

Bonobo Network presents: Stranger Things

🗓️ Date: Saturday, October 18th 2025 7pm-3am

📍 Location: Details revealed upon ticket purchase

SAVE THE DATE! TICKET LAUNCH THURSDAY September 25th at 7pm

👾 For one night only, Bonobo collides with the Upside Down! 👾

It’s 1987, and Hawkins, IN is about to turn upside down.

An interdimensional rift has opened, and things are getting more than a little bit... strange. Demodogs are nipping at our butts and some aggro weirdo named Vecna is threatening world domination. In fact, all manner of demons and monsters are beginning to slip from their world into ours.

A ragtag band of D&D nerds who still live with their parents are starting to unravel the mystery haunting Hawkins - and it all centers around their mysterious new friend with special powers, a woman whose only name is ‘69.’

It turns out that 69 can make anyone come with just a thought. Even better, when she uses her power on Mindflayers and demogorgons they literally explode in ecstasy. So now we know their weakness – orgasms can defeat the monsters and close the rift.

The problem is that before meeting 69, these dorks were going through a box of Kleenex and half a bottle of lotion every single day. They’re gonna need more than a little bit of help if they’re to save Hawkins from permanently slipping into The Upside Down.

That’s where YOU come in. 69 needs your help raising enough concentrated orgasmic energy in Hawkins to seal off the portal to The Upside Down. The plan is to create the biggest orgy the 1980s have ever seen, which means we’ll need a REALLY big venue: Starcourt Mall is the only place in Hawkins big enough for this mission.

It’s going to be a long night. Someone had better tell Steve that we’ll need all the Scoops Ahoy we can eat to get us through it.

This is a member’s only event. If you are interested in attending and learning more then join Bonobo Network here: https://www.bonobonetwork.com/apply

Bonobo Network presents: Queergasm: Potion No. 69

🗓️ Date: Saturday, October 11th 2025 7pm-2am

📍 Location: Mission Control - address will be released to ticket holders

SAVE THE DATE! TICKET LAUNCH THURSDAY September 18th at 7pm

GET TICKETS HERE: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/bonobo-network-presents-queergasm-potion-no-9-tickets-1645495002849?aff=oddtdtcreator
Password: broomstick

Agenda

7:00 PM - 9:30 PM  Doors open
NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.

7:30 PM - 9:00 PM Playshop: The Queer Coven Game

9:15 PM - 10:00 PM Opening Circle
[NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.]

1:30 AM - 2:00 AM Closing Circle
Closing Circle is a time for us to share our experience, ecstatic or hard, to be seen, known, and normalize that these events are a full spectrum experience for everyone.

About this event

The cauldron bubbles, the smoke curls, and the night hums with magic. Step into our queer coven where spells of desire are cast and every potion promises new delights. Under the glow of neon moons and shimmering candles, you’ll find yourself surrounded by witches, warlocks, and familiars of every flavor—stirring up trouble, mischief, and passion.

This is no ordinary gathering. It’s a night where queer enchantment takes center stage, where bodies move like incantations, and laughter mingles with moans in the air. The dance floor is a ritual circle, the dungeon a bubbling cauldron of sensation, and every corner an invitation to taste, to touch, to be transformed.

Come dressed in your witchy best—velvet cloaks, spellbound lingerie, glittering pentacles, or nothing but your raw magic. Sip our crafted elixirs, whisper secrets over bubbling brews, and let yourself be swept into the queerest, kinkiest coven you’ve ever known.

Because this isn’t just a party.This is Potion No. 69—a concoction of lust, laughter, and liberation that could only be brewed by Queergasm.

»»» What is Queergasm?

Queergasm is our ongoing party for queer folks. It's only open to queer people. That's because we want to create a space where queerness is not just welcomed or tolerated, but centered and celebrated.

For our purposes, if you identify as queer, this party is for you. No one will be checking your queer card. You are queer enough. If you are questioning or exploring if you might be queer or fall somewhere under the LGBTQ+ umbrella, you are welcome to attend Queergasm as you explore if you might identify as queer.

This party is for people with all levels of experience, from the merely curious or questioning to the most experienced swingers; from the decidedly monogamous to the most committed polyamorists. Under the umbrella of queerness, we welcome people representing every sexual preference, gender expression, and body type. None of us are getting free until we all get free.

»»» Queergasm is Now Using the PAL System!

We’re excited to announce that Queergasm will now be using the PAL system, which will allow more queer folks to get a taste of our community.

PAL stands for Pervy Activity Liaison (thanks to Polly Superstar of Kinky Salon and Mission Control for the term.) A PAL is a trusted friend (doesn’t have to be a date) who attends an event with you. PALs are responsible for each others’ behavior – if someone behaves in a way that negatively impacts the space, it reflects poorly on all of the PALs. And if we ask someone to leave an event for any reason, their PALs must exit as well. In this way, it not only ensures that people who are new to the community have a social anchor, it also ensures that everyone feels accountable to someone, which tends to encourage great behavior.Who Needs a PAL for Queergasm?

• Active Bonobo members do NOT need a PAL. You’re welcome to attend solo if you would like.

• Non-members MUST have a PAL to attend – even if you were previously a member.

• Two non-members CAN be each other’s PALs as long as they know and trust each other.

PAL Guidelines:

• Arrive & leave with a trusted friend (not necessarily a date).

• Your PAL can be of any gender, a couple, or a group—as long as you all agree to be responsible for each other.

• You are responsible for your PAL’s behavior, and they are responsible for yours.

• You must know and trust your PAL—you cannot PAL with a stranger.If either of you violate consent or event agreements, both of you will be held accountable.

PAL Frequently Asked Questions

»»» Playshop

The Queer Coven Game

At check-in, you’ll receive an Ingredient Card, a magical element that belongs in two of the six Queer Potions around the space.Each cauldron has a theme, six ingredients, and a Question to Join the Spell.

Find a cauldron that calls to you, introduce yourself, and answer its question, however flirty, funny, or sincere you’d like. Create your Queer Coven and then add your card to that potion.

You may join only one potion at a time, but you can switch covens later if temptation calls.

When a potion fills with six ingredients, that group performs a short ritual to activate it. Once it’s complete, everyone in that potion will have their names added to a drawing for a prize… because a little reward makes the magic even sweeter. Names will be drawn at the end of opening circle.

»»» Activities

• Witch Hat Ring Toss

• Wooden Spirit Talking Board

• Pendulum Dowsing Divination Board

• Make your own potion bottle

»»» Music: GLADBOX

Gladbox is a queer DJ duo and couple based in Oakland, California. Known for their dynamic, genre-blurring sets, Gladbox crafts infectiously danceable experiences that draw from techno, disco, breaks, and trance. They’ve performed at iconic spaces including Folsom Street Fair, Dore Alley, The Eagle SF, and Powerhouse, as well as underground warehouse raves across the Bay Area. Whether playing a sunrise set or a packed basement, Gladbox brings joy to every dancefloor they touch.🔥

»»» Dress to Impress

Step into the coven dressed to enchant—velvet cloaks, corsets, fishnets, lace, pointy hats, and glittering pentacles are all welcome under the witch’s moon. Think potion-inspired colors like deep purples, glowing greens, midnight black, and shimmering silver, or lean into enchanted rave wear with neon glow and glam witch couture. Whether you arrive in lingerie that feels spellbound or as the raw magical creature you already are, come dressed to seduce, bewitch, and stir the cauldron of Potion No. 69.

When you’re on the street: Please DO NOT dress like you're going to a giant sex party!

»»» Connect on Plura (FKA Bloom)

Want to see who's going, match, chat, and meet the community? Check out the event on Plura Community (FKA Bloom)

»»» Venue Accessibility

We regret to inform you that this venue space is not fully wheelchair-friendly. While the first floor is accessible, there are stairs leading to other areas of the venue, which may pose a challenge for individuals with mobility impairments. Additionally, please be aware that the bathrooms and showers are not equipped with wheelchair-accessible facilities. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause and are committed to making accommodations wherever possible. If you have specific accessibility needs or require further assistance, please do not hesitate to contact us in advance, and we will do our utmost to assist you. The venue has implemented several COVID precautions for your safety. Each room is equipped with air purifiers, and we have a spacious outdoor area with seating available in the garden.

»»» Inviting your friends

Want to invite a friend to this or future parties? Great! They'll need to become a member. Invite them to learn more about us and apply at https://bonobonetwork.com/apply

If you know someone really well, you can let us know that by endorsing their application. The standard for endorsement is high, as is the bar for membership. Your friends should FULLY understand Bonobo Network's culture, especially around consent.

Who we're looking for:

• They should be broadly familiar with their boundaries and be able to set boundaries with others.

• They should be able to resolve conflicts gracefully, generously, and empathetically.

• They're someone you trust to be accountable to you and to this community.

• Ideally, you trust them implicitly, and you would either play with them yourself or recommend that your friends play with them at the party.

• You would feel comfortable staking your reputation on their being a good fit for our community. (NOTE: This is different from feeling confident that they would enjoy themselves or get something out of the experience.)

»»» Volunteering

Volunteering is a great way to meet other Bonobos, and volunteer tickets have discounts baked into them as a thank you for your contribution. Available roles include:

Pre-Party

• Truck loading (90 minutes before the party)

During Party

• Setup (Saturday 5pm - 7pm Pre-party)

• Food Support (90 minutes at the beginning of the party)

• Greeting (90 minute shifts before and during party)

• Angel Crew (60 minute shifts during party)

• Kitchen/Cleaning (60 minute shifts during party)

• Strike (60 minute shift at end of party, 1am - 2am)

Post-Party

• Truck unload (90 minutes, day after the party)

»»» Covid Policy

We no longer have a vaccination requirement. You can find our official Covid Policy here

Your COVID testing options are:

• Present a timestamped photo of a covid rapid antigen test taken the day of the event at the door. (VASTLY PREFERRED OPTION)

• Bring your own COVID test to take on site. If you use this option, please wear a mask into the venue. There will be a limited supply of rapid tests available for purchase - PLEASE BRING YOUR OWN.

• Buy a COVID test at the time you buy your ticket or on-site.

If you need to take a covid test onsite, you must wear a mask.

»»» Incident Reporting

If your boundaries are crossed at the party, if a Bonobo member acts in ways that are not in accordance with our culture and values, or even if someone just kinda creeps you out, please report the incident to an angel or party host. We also encourage you to file an incident report online at http://bit.ly/bonoboincidentreport.

Incident reports aren't just for consent violations at Bonobo events. If people are behaving in the ways described above outside of parties, it can be helpful for organizers to know.

»»» Registration + Tickets

Tickets for our standard members will be on a sliding scale starting at $65.

Tickets will be on a sliding scale starting at $55 for PrimeMates, our premium members. [PRIMEMATE MEMBERS: You have a special code that you received when you became a member. Use that for your discount.]

IMPORTANT!

If you're purchasing more than one ticket, please make sure each individual attending is named!

Our Ticketing Pricing Policy - Updated 7.24.24

***NOTAFLOF Tickets - Action Required (see below)

As we continue to grow and create memorable experiences together, we want to share some important updates regarding the way we manage tickets for our events. Thank you for your feedback about access to tickets and creating ease around ticket transfers. We hope these changes provide a lot better user experience. We are also providing clearer guidelines about use of NOTOFLOF codes and a new request system for those who use those codes.

Supporting Our Community: No One Turned Away for Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) Changes

NOTAFLOF Codes by Request Only

We will be changing the NOTAFLOF codes for each party. Please use this the form below before the event to request a NOTAFLOF discount code. You can then apply this code on the day of the ticket drop.

Request a NOTAFLOF discount code here

We are committed to inclusivity and accessibility. Our sliding scale tiket pricing remains in place to support those with financial hardship while allowing those with greater means to contribute more. This helps us uphold our No One Turned Away For Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) policy. We would like to offer some examples of what code to use based on need.

25% Off: For those with moderate financial needs. Examples might include:

• Individuals supporting a dependent.

• Those with some medical expenses not covered by insurance.

• Individuals who have periodic financial difficulties but can generally manage their expenses.

50% Off: For those with significant financial constraints. Examples might include:

• Individuals with significant debt or loans.

• Those who receive public assistance or unemployment benefits.

• People with substantial immigration-related expenses.

75% Off: For those with severe financial hardship. Examples might include:

• Single parents or guardians with no additional financial support.

• Those with limited income or support.

• Individuals with large, ongoing medical expenses or disabilities.

• Unpaid community organizers with no disposable income.

Waitlists:

We are experimenting with a prototype waitlist system. Before requesting a refund, please check the waitlist to see if someone else can take your spot.

While we are working on a better system, we will use a spreadsheet for the waitlist. You can find the link to the waitlist spreadsheet in the Eventbrite event description.

We also want to extend our gratitude to the community members who have been managing this on their own for the last few parties. Your efforts have been invaluable, and we are thrilled to implement a more formal process on our end. We’re also grateful to the handful of community members that are currently volunteering their time to help us design a better waitlist!

Please use the waitlist spreadsheet to sell your ticket, including volunteer tickets. Our Volunteer No Show Policy is now in effect for all parties

Ticket transfers: You can update the info on eventbrite yourself or email info@bonobonetwork.com with the new ticket holder first and last name, email address and phone number. If transferring after final details email and volunteer emails have come out, please forward these communications

Refund Policy:

• We are still working on the details of our official refund policy, including the specifics of our Covid refund policy. Stay tuned for more updates soon.

Thank you for being a part of our community and for your understanding as we experiment and implement these changes.

»»» Bonobo Network Principles

What began as a series of small parties in Summer 2010 has grown into a community that has served 3,000 people around the Bay Area and the world. Our community is united by the following principles, which inform how we orient towards the spaces we share and how we treat one another:

High Possibility, Low Expectation: Our communities are best when they're treated as high possibility, low expectation spaces. That means two things: first, that all kinds of awesome sexy interactions are possible, but that no one should be expected to interact with you in any particular way. No one owes you anything. Second, we often attend these events with an expectation of the type or quality of experience we should have. While anything is possible, you'll probably have a much better experience if you lose those expectations of yourself and open yourself up to the abundance of connection of all kinds available to you at the party. Low expectation DOES NOT mean "low desire" – we believe it's helpful to have a well-explored and articulated sense of what you want and to hold those desires lightly.

Trust and Integrity: Parties like ours are built on trust – that's what allows us to be as open and welcoming and vulnerable as we can be inside those spaces. But this requires that we all show up in full integrity, pledging to be our most trustworthy. Three important implications of this : keep the identities of folks at our events confidential, proactively disclose relevant safer sex risks, and take exquisite care of the venues, spaces, and neighborhood ecosystems that host us.

Consent: We agree that we will only physically engage with one another, including nonsexual touch, where there is CLEAR CONSENT. We define consent as an ongoing collaboration between two or more people in constant verbal, physical, and emotional dialogue about what each other needs to safely, willingly, and pleasurably interact with one another. Gold standard consent in Bonobo Network is affirmative, informed, unpressured, specific, competently given, and ongoing. Respecting and valuing consent isn't just about preventing violations that shred trust -- it's also about making sure that everyone has as much space as they need to fully occupy their yes. Please read our Consent and Accountability Policy (https://bit.ly/bonoboconsentpolicy) for more details on how we approach consent and accountability.

High Challenge, High Support: Play parties can be challenging and emotionally complex, even for seasoned veterans. We’re committed to making the play parties we throw high challenge, high support environments. We come together to celebrate and play at our edges. To fully support that endeavor, we provide a dedicated nonsexual space at each party for folks who need to get away from the intensity of the gathering. It means recruiting a team of angels who are available to provide counseling and social support throughout the party. And it means encouraging everyone who attends to commit to being an angel for everyone around them.

H ere's a guide to have a pre-party conversation with your sweetie(s) to make your party go smoothly for both of you: https://bit.ly/beingpartyready

Everyone Contributes: Parties like this are never the work of a single organizer -- it takes the participation and contribution of a host of people. Everyone who attends is expected to co-create the party: money, time, energy, enthusiasm, work, intention, example, concern and/or awareness.

Inclusion: We are dedicated to fostering inclusion in our community. No matter your race, ethnicity, gender identity, or class background, we want everyone who participates in this community to understand that they belong here, and that they have as much of a stake in what happens here as anyone else does. While we recognize that everyone is on a learning curve when it comes to learning how to foster such an atmosphere, we also commit to a stance of learning -- and supporting one another's learning -- of how to be excellent to one another.

This is a dynamic list, ever growing, changing, and deepening as this grand experiment in connection continues. Thanks to you all for playing mad scientist with us.

Bonobo Network Presents: VIBE+ The Fall Union
 

🗓️ Date: Saturday, October 4, 2025 7pm-2am

📍 Location: Details revealed upon ticket purchase

SAVE THE DATE! TICKET LAUNCH THURSDAY September 11th at 7pm

 GET TICKETS HERE: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/bonobo-network-presents-vibe-the-fall-union-tickets-1671955968309?aff=oddtdtcreator

»»» Agenda

7:00 PM - 9:00 PM Doors Open
We require everyone to arrive in time for opening circle.

9:00 PM - 9:30 PM Opening Circle
[NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.]

9:45PM - 10:45PM Workshop - Mx Mayhem Mai Impact Tasting

10:00 PM - 1:00 AM DJ Vanessa

1:30 AM - 2:00 AM Closing Circle
Closing Circle is a time for us to share our experience, ecstatic or hard, to be seen, known, and normalize that these events are a full spectrum experience for everyone.

»»» About this event

Welcome to The Fall Union, a VIBE Plus gathering where we embrace the heat of connection in the cooling season. This BIPOC-centered and celebrated community event honors passion, intimacy, and the beauty of coming together as one.

As autumn turns and the harvest ripens, we gather in the spirit of union — where love, desire, and play flourish beyond boundaries. This is a space for BIPOC individuals to shine, connect, and celebrate** alongside their non-BIPOC partners, lovers, and allies.

Using the PAL system, BIPOC attendees may invite up to two non-BIPOC guests, ensuring a welcoming and expansive atmosphere while holding true to the heart of our community.

Prepare for a night of fire and falling, of abundance and surrender — a union of bodies, spirits, and desire.

Welcome to VIBE Plus: The Fall Union — where we harvest connection, fire, and joy together.

»»» Introducing VIBE!

Hey friends,

I’m William Winters and I’m one of the cofounders of Express Yourself. Express Yourself has been an incredible resource for Black and Brown folks exploring the joys and anxieties of sexuality in a community environment. Over the years, the folks who poured their hearts into creating the Express Yourself parties helped create some of the warmest play spaces I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing and was part of a vibrant emerging ecosystem of sex-positive events built by and for folks of color that included KPOC, SOUL, Black Kink Bay Area, and others.

Recently Express Yourself hasn’t run as frequently as had been planned at the beginning of the year. Rebecca, the remaining organizer, had changing life circumstances and insufficient logistical support to keep it going on her own.

So I’m announcing that Express Yourself is officially becoming part of Bonobo Network (which I also founded), and it’s getting a new name and new leadership while retaining some of the features that made it special. It’s still a POC-exclusive party. It still uses the PAL system, so Bonobo Network membership isn’t required. And we still expect that the parties will take place about quarterly.

Meet the new producer, Scott! He’s been a dedicated member of our community, volunteering and building meaningful relationships for a couple years. Now, he’s excited to curate unique party experiences for our BIPOC community. Here’s some of what he has to say about what VIBE is...

»»» What is VIBE

Welcome to VIBE, a reimagined experience designed to create a space of celebration. VIBE stands for Versatile Inclusion, Bold Expressions, embodying a space where diversity thrives, creativity flourishes, and every voice is heard.Versatile Inclusion: At VIBE, we embrace the rich tapestry of cultures, identities, and experiences that people of color bring to the table. Our events are crafted to be inclusive and welcoming, ensuring that everyone feels seen, valued, and respected. Whether you’re here to dance, connect, or simply be yourself, VIBE is your space to shine.Bold Expressions: VIBE is all about celebrating the unique and powerful ways BIPOC express themselves. From vibrant performances and art showcases to dynamic discussions and interactive activities, our events are a platform for bold, unapologetic self-expression. We encourage you to bring your full self to the party and share your story with the world.These exclusive parties are dedicated solely to BIPOC, providing a safe and empowering environment where folks of color can connect, celebrate, and express themselves freely.

Join us at VIBE, where every moment is an opportunity to connect, create, and celebrate the beauty of diversity. Let’s make every event a testament to the power of Versatile Inclusion and Bold Expressions.

For our purposes, we define "person of color" as people who have lived experiences as a racial minority in the United States. At least one birth parent was perceived and treated as a person of color, or would have been were they in the United States.

This party is for people with all levels of experience, from the merely curious or questioning to the most experienced swingers; from the decidedly monogamous to the most committed polyamorists. We welcome people representing every sexual preference, gender expression, and body type. None of us are getting free until we all get free.

»»» Housetop Mx Mayhem Mai 9:45pm-10:45pm

Mx Mayhem Mai (they/them) is a queer, nonbinary pro-dom and educator known for their iconic ambidextrous play style. Whether it’s floggers, canes, or whips, Mayhem’s double-handed impact topping and predicament specialties are sure to tantalize all levels of kinksters!

Sign up for a 10 minute impact tasting with Mayhem, or catch one of their upcoming classes!

Keep up with them at https://allmylinks.com/MxMayhemMai

»»» Connect on Plura (FKA Bloom)

Want to see who's going, match, chat, and meet the community? Check out the event on Plura Community (FKA Bloom)

»»» Venue Accessibility

We regret to inform you that this venue space is not fully wheelchair-friendly. While the first floor is accessible, there are stairs leading to other areas of the venue, which may pose a challenge for individuals with mobility impairments. Additionally, please be aware that the bathrooms and showers are not equipped with wheelchair-accessible facilities. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause and are committed to making accommodations wherever possible. If you have specific accessibility needs or require further assistance, please do not hesitate to contact us in advance, and we will do our utmost to assist you. The venue has implemented several COVID precautions for your safety. Each room is equipped with air purifiers, and we have a spacious outdoor area with seating available in the garden.

»»» PAL System

VIBE uses the PAL system which will allow more BIPOC folks get a taste for our community. Bonobo's with active memberships do not need a PAL.

PAL stands for Pervy Activity Liaison (thanks to Polly Superstar of Kinky Salon and Mission Control for the term.) A PAL is a trusted friend (doesn’t have to be a date) who attends an event with you. PALs are responsible for each others’ behavior – if someone behaves in a way that negatively impacts the space, it reflects poorly on all of the PALs. And if we ask someone to leave an event for any reason, their PALs must exit as well. In this way, it not only ensures that people who are new to the community have a social anchor, it also ensures that everyone feels accountable to someone, which tends to encourage great behavior.

Who Needs a PAL for VIBE?

• Active Bonobo members do NOT need a PAL. You’re welcome to attend solo if you would like.

• Non-members MUST have a PAL to attend – even if you were previously a member.

• Two non-members CAN be each other’s PALs as long as they know and trust each other.

PAL Guidelines:

• Arrive & leave with a trusted friend (not necessarily a date).

• Your PAL can be of any gender, a couple, or a group—as long as you all agree to be responsible for each other.

• You are responsible for your PAL’s behavior, and they are responsible for yours.

• You must know and trust your PAL—you cannot PAL with a stranger.If either of you violate consent or event agreements, both of you will be held accountable.

PAL Frequently Asked Questions

»»» Volunteering

Volunteering is a great way to meet other Bonobos, and volunteer tickets have discounts baked into them as a thank you for your contribution.

Available roles include:

Pre-Party

• Setup (Saturday 5pm - 7pm Pre-party) [$30 ticket]

During Party

• Food Support (90 minutes at the beginning of the party) [$30 ticket]

• Greeting (90 minute shifts before and during party) [$40 ticket]

• Angel Crew (60 minute shifts during party) [$40 ticket]

• Cleaning (60 minute shifts during party) [$40 ticket]

Post-Party

• Strike (2 hours Post-Party) [$20 ticket]

You will receive an email with more details about your role and shift the day before the party.

»»» Covid Policy

We no longer have a vaccination policy. You can find our official Covid Policy here

Your COVID testing options are:

• Present a timestamped photo of a covid rapid antigen test taken the day of the event at the door. (VASTLY PREFERRED OPTION)

• Bring your own COVID test to take on site. If you use this option, please wear a mask into the venue. There will be a limited supply of rapid tests available for purchase - PLEASE BRING YOUR OWN.

• Buy a COVID test at the time you buy your ticket or on-site.

If you need to take a covid test onsite, you must wear a mask.

»»» Incident Reporting

If your boundaries are crossed at the party, if a Bonobo member acts in ways that are not in accordance with our culture and values, or even if someone just kinda creeps you out, please report the incident to an angel or party host. We also encourage you to file an incident report online at http://bit.ly/bonoboincidentreport.

Incident reports aren't just for consent violations at Bonobo events. If people are behaving in the ways described above outside of parties, it can be helpful for organizers to know.

»»» Registration + Tickets

Tickets for our standard members will be on a sliding scale starting at $65.

Tickets will be on a sliding scale starting at $55 for PrimeMates, our premium members. [PRIMEMATE MEMBERS: You have a special code that you received when you became a member. Use that for your discount.]

Our Ticketing Pricing Policy - Updated 7.24.24

***NOTAFLOF Tickets - Action Required (see below)

As we continue to grow and create memorable experiences together, we want to share some important updates regarding the way we manage tickets for our events. Thank you for your feedback about access to tickets and creating ease around ticket transfers. We hope these changes provide a lot better user experience. We are also providing clearer guidelines about use of NOTOFLOF codes and a new request system for those who use those codes.

Supporting Our Community: No One Turned Away for Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) Changes

NOTAFLOF Codes by Request Only

We will be changing the NOTAFLOF codes for each party. Please use this the form below before the event to request a NOTAFLOF discount code. You can then apply this code on the day of the ticket drop.

Request a NOTAFLOF discount code here

We are committed to inclusivity and accessibility. Our sliding scale tiket pricing remains in place to support those with financial hardship while allowing those with greater means to contribute more. This helps us uphold our No One Turned Away For Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) policy. We would like to offer some examples of what code to use based on need.

25% Off: For those with moderate financial needs. Examples might include:

• Individuals supporting a dependent.

• Those with some medical expenses not covered by insurance.

• Individuals who have periodic financial difficulties but can generally manage their expenses.

50% Off: For those with significant financial constraints. Examples might include:

• Individuals with significant debt or loans.

• Those who receive public assistance or unemployment benefits.

• People with substantial immigration-related expenses.

75% Off: For those with severe financial hardship. Examples might include:

• Single parents or guardians with no additional financial support.

• Those with limited income or support.

• Individuals with large, ongoing medical expenses or disabilities.

• Unpaid community organizers with no disposable income.

Waitlists:

We are experimenting with a prototype waitlist system. Before requesting a refund, please check the waitlist to see if someone else can take your spot.

While we are working on a better system, we will use a spreadsheet for the waitlist. You can find the link to the waitlist spreadsheet in the Eventbrite event description.

We also want to extend our gratitude to the community members who have been managing this on their own for the last few parties. Your efforts have been invaluable, and we are thrilled to implement a more formal process on our end. We’re also grateful to the handful of community members that are currently volunteering their time to help us design a better waitlist!

Please use the waitlist spreadsheet to sell your ticket, including volunteer tickets. Our Volunteer No Show Policy is now in effect for all parties

Ticket transfers: You can update the info on eventbrite yourself or email info@bonobonetwork.com with the new ticket holder first and last name, email address and phone number. If transferring after final details email and volunteer emails have come out, please forward these communications

Refund Policy:

• We are still working on the details of our official refund policy, including the specifics of our Covid refund policy. Stay tuned for more updates soon.

Thank you for being a part of our community and for your understanding as we experiment and implement these changes.

»»» Bonobo Network Principles

What began as a series of small parties in Summer 2010 has grown into a community that has served 3,000 people around the Bay Area and the world. Our community is united by the following principles, which inform how we orient towards the spaces we share and how we treat one another:

High Possibility, Low Expectation: Our communities are best when they're treated as high possibility, low expectation spaces. That means two things: first, that all kinds of awesome sexy interactions are possible, but that no one should be expected to interact with you in any particular way. No one owes you anything. Second, we often attend these events with an expectation of the type or quality of experience we should have. While anything is possible, you'll probably have a much better experience if you lose those expectations of yourself and open yourself up to the abundance of connection of all kinds available to you at the party. Low expectation DOES NOT mean "low desire" – we believe it's helpful to have a well-explored and articulated sense of what you want and to hold those desires lightly.

Trust and Integrity: Parties like ours are built on trust – that's what allows us to be as open and welcoming and vulnerable as we can be inside those spaces. But this requires that we all show up in full integrity, pledging to be our most trustworthy. Three important implications of this : keep the identities of folks at our events confidential, proactively disclose relevant safer sex risks, and take exquisite care of the venues, spaces, and neighborhood ecosystems that host us.

Consent: We agree that we will only physically engage with one another, including nonsexual touch, where there is CLEAR CONSENT. We define consent as an ongoing collaboration between two or more people in constant verbal, physical, and emotional dialogue about what each other needs to safely, willingly, and pleasurably interact with one another. Gold standard consent in Bonobo Network is affirmative, informed, unpressured, specific, competently given, and ongoing. Respecting and valuing consent isn't just about preventing violations that shred trust -- it's also about making sure that everyone has as much space as they need to fully occupy their yes. Please read our Consent and Accountability Policy (https://bit.ly/bonoboconsentpolicy) for more details on how we approach consent and accountability.

High Challenge, High Support: Play parties can be challenging and emotionally complex, even for seasoned veterans. We’re committed to making the play parties we throw high challenge, high support environments. We come together to celebrate and play at our edges. To fully support that endeavor, we provide a dedicated nonsexual space at each party for folks who need to get away from the intensity of the gathering. It means recruiting a team of angels who are available to provide counseling and social support throughout the party. And it means encouraging everyone who attends to commit to being an angel for everyone around them.

Here's a guide to have a pre-party conversation with your sweetie(s) to make your party go smoothly for both of you: https://bit.ly/beingpartyready

Everyone Contributes: Parties like this are never the work of a single organizer -- it takes the participation and contribution of a host of people. Everyone who attends is expected to co-create the party: money, time, energy, enthusiasm, work, intention, example, concern and/or awareness.

Inclusion: We are dedicated to fostering inclusion in our community. No matter your race, ethnicity, gender identity, or class background, we want everyone who participates in this community to understand that they belong here, and that they have as much of a stake in what happens here as anyone else does. While we recognize that everyone is on a learning curve when it comes to learning how to foster such an atmosphere, we also commit to a stance of learning -- and supporting one another's learning -- of how to be excellent to one another.

This is a dynamic list, ever growing, changing, and deepening as this grand experiment in connection continues. Thanks to you all for playing mad scientist with us.